


call all you want (but there's no one home)

by patriciaselina



Category: Free!
Genre: ...sort of, Age Difference, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Boss/Employee Relationship, Future Fic, Gen, M/M, Phone Calls & Telephones, Workplace, awkward Rin
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-02
Updated: 2014-07-04
Packaged: 2018-02-07 03:56:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,887
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1884420
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/patriciaselina/pseuds/patriciaselina
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>This is the only thing Rin really knows about his best friend’s job – Rei’s boss is really hot.</p><p>(In celebration of Free!ES airing tonight, have some silly MakoRins. Now also includes a really short Reigisa interlude.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Happy Water Day, everybody! Here’s a quick MakoRin thing, based off something I heard at work. It’s really short, and really silly, but still…I hope you like it!
> 
> Titled after a Lady Gaga/Beyonce song because I wholeheartedly believe that those are Rin’s guilty pleasures.

.

.

.

“It’s _unfair_ ,” Rin had groaned, draping himself over the couch as Rei patted down his tie for what had seemed to be the millionth time that morning. It was to be Rei’s first day at his new job, as internal auditor for the headquarters of the massive Tachibana conglomerate. “ _I_ wanna work there, too.”

“Oh?” Rei said, as he abandoned his tie and honed in on Rin with a quizzical look. “Well, Rin-san, you’re in luck. If you really wanted to work for the Tachibana _zaibatsu_ , you can apply for any of their available job openings – they’re such an enormous business, after all, and I doubt they’d run out of positions they’d need filled.”

At that Rin had only frowned, and told his roommate, “I don’t want just _any_ job, dork prince. I wanted to have _your_ job.”

“The _idea_ –” Rei paused, shell-shocked at his friend’s words. Then, realizing that this is _Rin_ he’s talking to and the day Rin makes sense would be miraculous in nature, Rei had been left with nothing to do but sigh, push up his glasses, and carry on. “The idea…would be preposterous to say the least, Rin-san. I am, after all, an Accountancy major, with enough years of experience at a rather prestigious audit firm, and as such this position fits me with ease. But as for you – your course, while prestigious in its own design, is, sad to say, unfit for the position that I hold, and as such –”

“Are you saying that just ‘cuz I’m an Engineering major and not a fancy-schmancy accountant your math is better than mine, huh? ‘Cuz you’re _wrong_ , bro. _Totally_ wrong. C’mere and lemme show you how different you are from _me_.”

Now, it had been supposed to be Rei’s first day at work, and Rei had meant to leave promptly after their early breakfast (to “ _make a good first impression_ ”, he had said), but one thing Rin and Rei share is that they never back down from any challenge, no matter how petty it may seem to the casual onlooker. So, exactly ten seconds after Rei recalculated how much commuting time he’d still have left after taking Rin up on his challenge, they snatched up pens and papers from the coffee table and then.

 _Then_.

It took Rin seven equations and a little over ten minutes, but he proved his point.

Rei, seemingly unruffled by Rin’s hysterical cackling, only pushed up his glasses and stood up. “This only goes to show that I really was _fated_ to be an Accountancy major. For not only do we accept that we cannot do everything but our own power, we also respect the majesty of technology; hence, our need for a well-rounded calculator in everyday life. In my case, this wondrous scientific calculator, which I shall take to work now. It shan’t be good of me to end up late on my first day.” As he walked over to the door, he called out over his shoulder, “See you later, Rin-san.”

“Show 'em what you've got, geek lord.”

“Naturally.”

.

.

.

That was two years ago. Now Rei’s gone all the way to become one of the most talked-about candidates to take the spot of CFO. Only after the retirement of the guy who’s currently the CFO, of course – nice old guy, bleached-blond hair with an undercut, kinda goofy. Furthest thing from Rei Ryugazaki you could ever see.

Rin thinks that guy’s kinda weird, but then again, he’s not the one working with him, and from what he hears Rei doesn’t _not_ like the guy so he can’t be too bad. But that’s not the issue here.

The issue is that this is the only thing Rin really knows about his best friend’s job – Rei’s boss is _really_ hot.

Not the _normal_ kind of hot, the one that Rin had seen every day when he was still going Olympic, the one that Rin used whenever he’d look at himself in reflective surfaces. Makoto Tachibana’s type of hot is some otherworldly kind, the kind of hot that the universe probably based astronomical arrangements over, and all of this is despite the fact that Rin had only ever seen him in the news and the papers and in the holiday cards Rei sometimes brings home from work.

Pressed suits and soft smiles aside, however, Makoto Tachibana is still a stuffy old businessman, so Rin never really meant to pay lots of attention to him – Rin is, after all, the pure epitome of _un_ -stuffy, the kind of guy whose spontaneity makes bureaucrats all over the world cry tears of blood. So yeah, Rin definitely never ever thought of someday meeting this Tachibana guy. And someday telling him, ‘ _y’know what, I think you’re the hottest guy I’ve ever seen_ ’. Nope. Not at all. Not even in his dreams. He’s absolutely certain of it.

Well, anyway. This issue wasn’t normally an issue – well, maybe except for the times when Rin fell asleep at night and ended up dreaming of warm skin and green eyes and soft lips and _nononoNO Rin Matsuoka we are not having this train of thought again_ – until the day when Rin decided, for the first time in Rei’s two-year work history in the Tachibana’s company, to call his friend’s work phone. Because Rei never turns on his personal phone when at work – he’s stubbornly traditional that way – and Rin really needs to contact him right now.

The reason was laughably simple. In true bachelor fashion, Rin had somehow broken the fridge – hey, no judging, Rin was bored and in-between projects and had to do something, _anything_ , how was he supposed to know that crossing those wires was gonna make everything go _ka-boom!_

Actually, don’t answer that. Rin was supposed to know that, because he is an adult and all that crap. _Damn it_.

Anyway, so now the fridge is out of commission and Rin wants to know if Rei wants to go home early so they can scope out new fridges before the appliance stores close. Rin’s really got his eye on this really nice one – cherry red double doors with a freezer large enough to store an entire suckling pig and then some. He knows it won’t fit in the small fridge alcove they’ve got in their sprawling apartment, but what the hell, he’s an engineer; he knows what he’s doing.

 _Eventually_.

 _Hopefully_.

And maybe Rin also wants to know if Rei wants to go eat at the really nice _katsudon_ place near their apartment. Because if he waits for Rei to come home, and Rei, perfectly perfect overachieving dork he is, goes overtime _again_ , Rin would probably bore himself to starvation waiting and have Rei for dinner Hannibal Lecter-style when he eventually got home and Rin knows that one of the best ways to have a best friend is to _not_ eat them.

Right now Rin’s got the phone ringing in his hand, as he hangs precariously over one edge of the couch. He’s so bored he’s actually counting the number of rings, and somewhere in between the seconds before he thinks _six_ , the call is answered.

“Hello?”

“Hey there, bro!” Rin half-yells, like he always does when he’s on the phone. It’s a particularly bad habit of his – has gotten him kicked out of more cinemas and restos and study-sessions-with-Rei than you can possibly count. “Let’s grab dinner later, then go out to look at fridges. I kinda broke the last one.”

There’s a clacking sound that Rin hears on the other side of the line – he knows that Rei’s got a set of framed pictures on his desk: one family pic with his parents and big bro, one small painting of a butterfly that their friend Haruka did for his eighteenth birthday, and a picture of them at Rei and Gou’s graduation, him and Rei and Gou and Haruka, smiling like idiots. Rin also knows that Rei fiddles with this last frame when he gets nervous. “Uh…” the voice trails off, weakly.

Rin kind of expected this. Rei is _such_ a hermit; it’s a miracle he actually gets the nerve to go out to work every morning. “Unless you’re still up for corporate hibernation, of course? Sheesh. What a bore. Why am I friends with you.”

The other person on the line – can’t be anyone other than Rei, Rin has his company calling card in his hands and checked and double- _and_ triple- checked it – does a little chuckle-thing that gets lost in all the volume of Rin’s voice. “That sounds interesting. Who is this, again?”

This is where Rin sits up abruptly on the couch, his eyes squinting at the direction of Rei’s bedroom with a ferocious glare. Rei’s played this game with him thrice before, as payback for the time when Rin had played a prank on him that had to be seen to be believed – it was a shock the first time, hilarious the second time, and getting kinda old the third time. “That’s funny,” Rin deadpans, still squinting as if doors were psychically connected to their owners, as if looks transmitted psychically could actually kill. “As if putting on your fake-damsel-in-distress accent is gonna work on me. This is _Rin_ , you dork.”

“Rin from…?”

Rin knows that he’s always called Rei an _idiot dork turbo butterfly nerd_ (with numerous variations on word choice and order, but that’s pretty much what he calls him), but as far as he knows Rei had not fallen this far, ever. Just this morning Rei was waxing poetic about dividends in arrears or something; Rin had tuned him out, focusing on the marshmallows bobbing in his bowl of cereal. It had looked relaxing. Now Rin wonders if all work and no play had finally gotten to his bestie’s head, and if so he thinks it’s too bad.

“It’s Rin from Iwatobi, y’know, the guy who used to go to school with you? The guy who pays half the apartment rent every month? The guy who really, _really_ hates the years when his little sister thought you were the hottest thing since the sun?” Why did Gou ever have a crush on Rei. He knows his friend is attractive, but just. Why. _Why_.

“Ahh, _that_ Rin. I’ve heard of you before,” the voice on the other side of the line says, laughter creeping into his voice and Rin swears, he absolutely _swears_ , as soon as that smug dork Rei gets home from work he’s gonna punch him so hard his ancestors are gonna feel it. “You’re looking for Rei, then?”

Rin is getting really tired of his best friend’s shit. “Rei, just cut the crap, okay. Just a yes or no. Will you go get dinner with me or will I just go solo while you squee over walkthrough tests or something even dorkier.”

“I’m all for getting dinner with you,” was that a hint of _flirt_ to Rei’s tone, what did the outrageous _fluttering_ feeling in Rin’s stomach mean, eww _no_ this is his best friend the little dork who held on to his hand and cried when they went in the haunted house Rin’s class did for the school festival, Rin is not supposed to find this _attractive_. “But I think I’m not who you’re looking for.”

Before Rin can conjure up a witty retort, or tell his heart to shut up and stop beating like a goddamned marching band, Rin hears another voice speaking, on the other side of the line.

“Oh, _Tachibana-san_! I’m so sorry; you had to take my call for me…”

“It’s nothing, Rei, and didn’t I tell you that you could call me ‘Makoto’?”

 _God_.

Rin has no idea what he’s supposed to do right about now.

 _Die_ , probably.

You know what – as soon as this call ends Rin’s definitely gonna work on that.

“…I do not dislike that offer. But nevertheless, you _are_ my boss, and that would still be improper of me.” _That’s my Rei_ , Rin thinks, bitterly, _stuck-up to the very core, even in the face of his BFF’s impending death_.

That Rei does not know of this death, metaphorical or otherwise, means little to Rin. The point is that instead of being here, by the phone, where Rin can chat the ears off Rei and have him hear it, Rei was off doing something else, and so here Rin is, making a fool of himself.

“You’re really a serious guy, huh. It surprises me how easily Nagisa-san has taken to you.” the voice says, totally blissfully unaware of Rin’s mental hysterics. The voice – _Tachibana’s_ voice – _Makoto’s_ voice, good Lord. Rin never even in his wildest dreams imagined that a guy that hot would have a voice to match, even though seeing as sayings like _when it rains it pours_ exist he definitely should’ve seen it coming. How did he mistake that voice for that of his dorky best friend’s, by the way? Charles Darwin is definitely rolling in his grave wondering how Rin had lived this far, for sure.

“…I wouldn’t go so far as to say that Nagisa-san has… _taken_ to me.” Rei stammers and Rin knows him so well that he can almost hear the blush in his tone – finally, familiar territory. Nagisa is the small cute blond trainee who Rei always rant-gushes about each and every night since the day he got into Rei’s department and stayed there, and by now Rin thinks he could stick a knife in all the unresolved tension Rei’s got around the kid and call it Excalibur.

“But that’s irrelevant. Shall I take my call now?”

“Yeah, Rei. But one thing, first.”

Rin is definitely not gonna live to see tomorrow. And so he’s about to say that Makoto Tachibana shouldn’t bother, ‘cuz Rin already knows he’s effectively waived his right to live by screaming at the richest bachelor in Japan that his voice sounded like a girl’s and that he was a complete bore, but he beats Rin to it.

“‘Rin’, right? I’m not Rei, but if _you’re_ still up for it, then yeah. Dinner sounds nice.” Rin’s heart is beating in his ears and it’s getting really annoying, to be honest. “I’m gonna look forward to your call.”

“What just happened?” Rei says, curiously, as Makoto finally passes the phone to him – thank heavens for small mercies. “Rin-san, are you all right?”

“Rei,” Rin breathes, slowly, cautiously, a trembling hand going over his triathlon-racing heart, “I think I might’ve just died.”

“Really.”

“Yeah. I distinctly remember screaming the hell outta your boss, and then…I have gotta be dead. It’s impossible. Did your boss just _ask me out_?”

“Yes, Rin-san. Yes he did.”

“I’m dead.”

“You’ve said that thrice already.”

“Also I broke the fridge.”

Rei bites his lips, presses his free hand to his face, and doesn’t say anything in reply.

“I’m dead, aren’t I?”

“Say that another time, Rin-san, and believe me, the next time people say that about you, it is going to be the truth.”

.

.

.

_**fin.** _

 


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Something really silly (and really short!) about the Reigisa side of this fic! This is based very loosely off the age difference in Rhythm of Happiness, something in BBC Sherlock, and something my boss told me regarding my other boss, on my first day at the job. Very very loosely. My boss isn't Rei Ryugazaki, for one. (If someone knows a way to make Rei Ryugazaki work at a Philippine bank, please, let me know.) And also, I don't actually like him - he's happily engaged, I'm happily fawning over swim dorks. But this is Reigisa, so yeah.
> 
> Nagisa is 18, and Rei 24 - Nagisa turns 19 somewhere in the middle of his tenure. This, however is more in tune with the Philippine school system pre-K12 (I'm 19, and already a graduating college student), than the Japanese one - afaik Japanese high schoolers graduate at 18. Idk what kind of course Nagisa's taking that requires an OJT at the first year of college, but roll with it, please.

“Nagisa-san,” Chigusa asks, with a jaunty smirk on her lovely face, “Do you have a girlfriend?”

The color that Nagisa’s cheeks turn into is all the answer she needs. “I - well, ahh? No.”

“A boyfriend, then.”

“No,” Nagisa sighs, simply, which catches Chigusa’s attention. It’s more resigned, than embarrassed - so,  _definitely_  interested, but absolutely sure he wouldn’t ever be able to say ‘ _yes_ ’ to that question any time soon.

Chigusa does a little squee in her head. This new kid is cute. And Rei is, well... _Rei_. This should be fun.

“I think I should warn you of something,” Chigusa says, intentionally timing her words so Rei could hear her say them. “No matter what happens, please don’t fall in love with him.”

“With who?”

“With Rei-san, of course.”

Rei makes a squawking noise somewhere in between a strangled cat and an overworked banshee and Chigusa thinks he might’ve just choked on his coffee.

Rei Ryugazaki, everyone. Accounting savant and future Tachibana  _zaibatsu_  CFO. Embarrassed by the concept of love.

Honestly, Chigusa likes how easy it is to rile him up.

“Each and every trainee that passes through our doors falls prey to him, Nagisa-san.  ** _Every_** _single one_. Without fail. They write sappy poems to him and stuff, and when they’re here come Valentines’ they give him chocolate.” Chigusa says, her keen eyes watching as Rei attempts to make himself more like the professional he is and less like the dork he also is. From the wide-eyed look Nagisa’s throwing him right now, he seems to have succeeded. “So I’d just want you to be careful.”

No response. Nagisa’s still staring. Rei still looks like a tomato finely and beautifully sculpted into the form of a man. Chigusa’s grin grows wider.

“Stop speaking  _nonsense_ , Hanamura-san,” Rei scolds, haltingly, pushing up his glasses in a last-ditch attempt to hide his blush. “So this is Hazuki-san?”

“Please call me ‘ _Nagisa_ ’!” Nagisa’s words rush out before he could stop himself, and he doesn’t even know how that happened. “I mean, yeah.”

Rei’s about to say something about the improperness of such address, but Chigusa cuts him off with a ferocious glare. Behave yourself, boss. So instead Rei stammers out, “N-Nagisa-kun, then,” and Chigusa just beams and beams, and beams some more,  _seriously_. This is just too precious.

 

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: The actual story was that one of the people I work with called up one of their workmates who also has an office at another branch. The person who answered the phone said that he didn’t know her, and basically she kept insisting that he did and also joked around with him because they’re friends and all. She might also have said that his voice sounded gay. Turns out it’s one of the big bosses of the entire company, so yeah. This fic kinda wrote itself. I only added in a couple of swim dorks and a whole lotta awkward romance.
> 
> I’m gonna go off to school early tomorrow, and I’m kinda coming up with a cold, so I won’t be able to wait for S2 E1 like I wanna, damnit. Anyway, I gotta go now – again, I hope you enjoyed this!


End file.
